A R G H !

So… I had to get to the library today; I had books due and they had a book waiting for me (their request and hold system is fodder for a whole ‘nother post). Told mom I was going to go FIRST thing in the morning, leaving even before they open to get there and home before the Florida heat becomes devastating as my car doesn’t have A/C. Woke her up around 8:30 and got ready to go. Then it happened… “Where’s my keys?!” They were RIGHT here on the table where I’ve put them after coming home for the last decade. Were they in the car where they sometimes fall out of the ignition? Nope. Were they in the computer room? Nope. Did they get washed Friday and end up in the laundry basket? Were they in the living room? Bathrooms? Nope, nope and still nope! Were they in the big garbage cans we keep in the garage? Why no, they weren’t but wasn’t that a pleasant place to go digging around in at 9:00 AM! I looked there because years ago my mom threw away my favorite Zippo that got too close to the newspapers on the kitchen table. Were they in the kitchen garbage? I don’t even want to think of the things that WERE but there weren’t any keys there!

Right about now I’m seriously flipping out. We’ve looked everywhere they could possibly be. There’s been a couple things that have disappeared from the house and never been found and my brain’s thinking that somehow someone has gotten into the house and nabbed the keys to mess with me, or maybe it’s the Car Key Gnomes, but all the doors are locked (I checked!). Then I saw my mom’s purse sitting on the kitchen table and even though I HEARD her pull her keys out to see if she had a copy of my car key so we could at least go to the library I decided to look there. They couldn’t POSSIBLY be in my mom’s purs… Oh look, my keys sitting UNDER her keys. Not only did she somehow grab my keys Thursday when I got home from grocery shopping she looked RIGHT AT THEM when she pulled her keys out and didn’t see them as I scuttled about the house like a madman looking for them!

Hawk (argh)


  1. John

    I once tore apart a hotel room looking for a $20 bill I knew I had set on the counter. Turned out I had absent-mindedly threw it in the trash. I was more than $20 worth of pissed at myself.

  2. Greg

    Aaahh………. so sit back, take a hit… take another. Aaahhh………… much better. Now you’re stoned. Wait!! Where’s the f**kin’ keys!!


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