June 1, 2007 by Hawk.

That’s right! PANIC! There’a a TROPICAL STORM in the Gulf of Mexico! Whatever will we do?! Oh, wait, I know. The news stations will break out the storm graphics, they’ll incessantly remind us there’s a TROPICAL STORM out there! “I’ll be here ALL night!” proclaimed one talking head in his fifth news slug in twenty minutes. They’ll send reporters out to stand in the drizzle so people will understand… It’s going to rain… we know this because there’s wet reporters on the TV screen. Aren’t we so much safer because of those wet reporters? I know I feel so much safer with the knowledge that someone was willing to risk their….hair style to prove to me it’s going to…rain. Hey, guys? I knew it was going to rain when I looked outside and everything was WET.

For the love of… the maximum sustained winds are 50 MPH. That’s just 10 - 15 MPH more than the wind gusts we’ve been having for the last WEEK! It’s nearly summer and it’s going to rain, RAIN!, in Florida. Who woulda thought that? Oh, right, anyone who’s lived here for more than one spring/summer…sheesh.

Sensationalists, that’s all they are. “Look at me, look at me, I’m on the TV!” They’re going to desensitize people to the real threat by doing this shit. Back before the 2004 storm season when we got hammered they pulled this same crap. There was a hurricane in the Atlantic, it was NOT coming here. It was not predicted to come here. And yet every local televisions station interrupted their evening broadcast to tell us, with great fervor, that the storm was NOT coming to Florida. “Stay tuned to this station so we can tell you that again in five minutes. While you wait you can watch this radar graphic. We’re back, still no storm for Floriduh, stay tuned so we can keep telling you that”.

It’s going to rain, people and it might get a little windy. Don’t go fly a kite this weekend, and drive a little more carefully, the roads are wet (if you hadn’t noticed), ok?

Hawk (not in panic mode)
 

Posted in Rant and Rave | 3 Comments »

June 1, 2007 by Hawk.

I was going to say it was unbelievable but that’d be a lie. It’s believable. For the 3rd Friday in a row my phone’s rung in the middle of the night. 1:15 am tonight, 3:02 am last week and 12:30 am the week before that. And each time it’s the same, brain-dead sounding stoner asking “Uhh….. is Jen there?”

This time I told him; “I told you last week there’s no Jen here. Would you mind getting the number right and not waking me up in the middle of the damn night?”

(un)Believably his response was; “Yeah, whatever, fuck you, jackass!”

He wakes me up for the third week in a row and has the stones to insult me because he’s too damned stoned to dial a freaking phone? I almost *69′d him and asked for Jen but I didn’t feel like starting a war with some unknown imbecile…

*sigh*
Hawk